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ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
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OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime
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SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her
at all.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do,
but married men are a lot more
willing to die.
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People are often unreasonable, Illogical, and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may Accuse you of being selfish,
And having ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you Will win some false friends
And some true enemies;
Succed anyway.
What you spend Years building, Someone may try
To destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you are honest and Frank, people may Cheat you
Be hones and Frank anyway.
The good you do today, People will often forget Tomorow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world Best you have, and It may never be enough;
Give the world the best You have anyway.
If you find serenity And happiness, they May be jealous.
Be happy anyway.
You see, in the final Analysis, it´s between You and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.
HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN
- Compliment her,
- respect her,
- honor her,
- cuddle her,
- kiss her,
- caress her,
- love her,
- stroke her,
- tease her,
- comfort her,
- protect her,
- hug her,
- hold her,
- spend money on her,
- wine and dine her,
- buy things for her,
- listen to her,
- care for her,
- stand by her,
- support her,
- go to the ends of the Earth for her.
HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN
- Show up naked.
- Bring food.
Now send this to 10 people or you will
have a bad love life for 3 years !
Secrets of a HAPPY LIFE...pictures
Ever wonder how the artsy fartsy guy next door seduces his date on the first night,
while you have to settle for that boring goodnight kiss?
Click here to learn...video
Heaven And Hell
HEAVEN Is where the police are all British,
The cooks are all French,
The mechanics are all German,
The lovers are all Lebanese,
And everything is organised by the Swiss
HELL Is
where the police are all German,
Cooks are all British,
The mechanics are all French,
The lovers are all Swiss,
And everything is organised by the Lebanese.
Women's age geography
Between the ages of 15 - 20 a woman is like Africa. She is half discovered, half wild.Between the ages of 20 - 30 a woman is like America. Fully discovered and scientifically perfect.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India & Japan. Very hot, wise and beautiful
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France. She is half destroyed after the war but still desirable.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Germany. She lost the war but not the hope.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia. Very wide, very quiet but nobody goes there
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England. With a glorious past but no future.
After 70, they become Siberia. Everyone knows where is it, but no one want to go there.
